Amy's story could be yours. Different details, same prison.
For five years, she'd been the department's most reliable employee. First to arrive, last to leave. The one who volunteered for everything. The one who never said no. Her annual reviews glowed with phrases like "team player" and "always willing to help."
Yet she'd been passed over for promotion three times. The last position went to Brad, who routinely left at 5 PM sharp and whose main talent seemed to be taking credit for other people's work—including Amy's.
That night, facing Sharon's expectation and her daughter's disappointment, Amy finally understood something that would revolutionize her career: being nice wasn't noble. It was naive.
Here's what Amy discovered in the months that followed, and what research in organizational psychology confirms:
Nice people don't get promoted. They get used.
The very qualities that make you a good person—empathy, selflessness, agreeability—become weapons that others use against you in professional settings. Your willingness to help becomes an expectation. Your flexibility becomes their convenience. Your humility becomes their opportunity.
Studies show that agreeable people earn significantly less over their careers than their more assertive counterparts. In one landmark study tracking business school graduates, the most agreeable men earned an average of $270,000 less over their careers than the least agreeable. For women, the gap was $40,000.
But here's what makes it worse: it's not just about money.